What should I do with my life?

What should I do with my life?

If you dread the dinner party question, “So, what do you do?” it might be time to ask yourself another oft-used question: “What should I do with my life?”

Some people know from childhood what they want to do with their life. Their instinct was so strong, their values so well formed even at that age that they made the perfect choice of profession right from the start.

But these people are rare. For most of us our working lives are a process of discovery. What we think interests actually bores us.

What we think will make us happy eventually disappoints us. And at some point in our working lives we find ourselves asking “Is this really how I want to spend the next 5/10/30 years of my life?”

If the answer is “no” then you have a choice – continue to live in a way that doesn’t really suit you OR find something else to do that actually fits who you are.

Simple, eh? But if it was that easy, everyone would be in jobs they love. So, what stops us?

What’s the secret?
Research by author Po Bronson identified some of the myths that prevent people from taking action and pursuing their dreams. He interviewed thousands of people who had asked themselves “What should I do with my life?” and who then took steps to make the answer a reality.

Myth 1: Money will fund my dream. If you are waiting for that big redundancy pay-off or for a long-lost Auntie to leave you a few million in order to start your new career you are probably buying in to this myth. But Po Bronson found that financial independence rarely triggered people to follow their calling. He concluded that having money changes you. Either the process of making it, the focus upon it or having too much of it lessens your hunger. The real triggers were emotional: losing a loved one, feeling like you were missing out on your children growing up, a divorce…People who really followed their dream didn’t wait until there was no financial risk. They made sure they had enough money as a safety net and then they went for it!

Myth 2: I am clever enough to do this. The next myth Bronson discovered was the assumption that you can scientifically deduce your ideal career. By looking at your strengths you can identify jobs that are perfect for you. Except that that doesn’t take in to account “passion” and “passion” is the key to finding a path that is going to suit you for years to come. His example was a woman who loved to solve puzzles. She concluded that doctors solve puzzles every day and began her medical training. But half way through she realised she didn’t like being with sick people all day. Intellectually her decision made sense. But she didn’t have the “passion” to get her through the tough times.

Myth 3: “What will I do? The question we generally ask ourselves when we’re looking for new direction is “What will I do”. But a more useful question would be “Who am I”? Different industries have different cultures. No matter how strong we are, we are affected by that culture. Therefore choosing a path where our values align with the values of the industry is vital. Ask yourself what you really believe in and then find a profession or direction that reflects those beliefs.

Myth 4: There are too many obstacles. In fact there is only one – your attitude. All the others are negotiable. In Bronson’s research a whole range of people from different backgrounds successfully redesigned their lives. Obstacles that would stop other less determined people didn’t stop them. Most of us have a fear that we’ll make a decision and be on a one-way track that doesn’t take us where we want to go. So we keep the doors open, leaving plenty of opportunity to turn back at any point. Those who succeed however really give themselves 100% to their dream. They listen to the little voice inside that whispers to them “You know what you really want to devote your life to, don’t you?” and they commit themselves to taking the leap.

Quote: Somerset Maugham
“It’s a funny thing about life; if you refuse to accept anything but the best, you very often get it”

-- Taken from “What Should I Do With My Life” by Po Bronson. Publ. Random House --

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For more information about choosing and getting your ideal job, check out these in-depth articles by Peter Bernard